13 Rules for Effective Communication in the Classroom #4 - Generalizations

http://createdforlearning.blogspot.com/2014/08/13-rules-for-effective-communication.html

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http://createdforlearning.blogspot.com/2014/08/13-rules-for-effective-communication-in_9.htmlBut what if they do those things all the time? Then the label is true, isn’t it! Maybe. But just because something is true, doesn’t mean it needs to be said. It’s one of the internal lies our brain tells us — I’m just being honest. Our student does something enough times and we start throwing around general statements about their personality, behavior, or character.
A painting by our daughter...
now to figure out how
to talk about it with her
in specifics. "I like the paint strokes
you used on this black shape here..."

Remember, our goal isn’t to fight. We don’t want to make our students mad. The problem is that these generalizations don’t deal with the specific situation at hand, and that should be our goal. Deal with the Right Here and Now, and try to tap into their hearts and minds.
So instead of a general statement like, “You never listen to me,” which breaks Rules #1, 2, & 4, we could say something like, “Just now when I asked you to get your Grammar Ninja packet out and turn to the Conjunctions page, I felt like you weren’t listening to me.”
If our student chooses to get mad now, it’s much less likely to be our fault. And when we choose to say our words that way, I’ll bet we’re much more likely to control our own anger.



 

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These rules are adapted with permission from Roger and Becky Tirabassi's premarital workbook for seriously dating and engaged couples - The Seriously Dating or Engaged Workbook. Roger and Becky have also co-authored a book for married couples called Little Changes Big Results for Crazy, Busy Couples. The principles in these books have changed so many areas of our life. We highly recommend them.


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